Update

Song of te day: “King” by Years and years. Very catchy tune. Considering it has been in my head off and on for the past few weeks, I’m not entirely sure yet if that is a good thing, or not. Hah.

So, here we are again. Home alone, sorta. Big brother is off to the Netherlands. Grandpa needs to have a procedure done to his heart, and needs 24 hour observation afterward, so big brother had to fly over. Not the handiest time, admittedly, but it had to be done despite the fact that it really is a very common procedure and not all that bad, according to numerous sources, but understandably grandpa is worried and would prefer to have a familiar face nearby afterward. He didn’t actually ask, didn’t want to make a bother of himself, I guess, but when we offered for one of us to come over, he did burst out in tears with relief. Poor guy.

Anyway, this means I’m on my own dog-sitting, literally, since I’m not worth a dime at the moment anyway with my tender leg and bum shoulder. Grrrr. Did try to do my fair share by hauling stuff one handed, doing dishes (only the big stuff, had to leave the utensils to big brother these past two weeks, I fear) cooking a few times, prepping dog food and sweeping floors and such boring things. You’d be amazed how slow stuff like that goes when you’re shoulder is bummed out of commission. Normally I cut dog bread in half an hour, forty-five minutes at most. Now it takes me over an hour. *sigh* It bums me out, I tell ya.

Didn’t manage as much these past two weeks as we would have liked to, naturally, but there was some progress made. One plus about big brother already having to travel to the Netherlands this very morning, is that he could already take two suitcases with stuff for him and grandpa, meaning that we’ll have more suitcase space available when “moving” day arrives. It means that my room is practically impassible with a stack of suitcases and boxes of the few things I’m going to try to store here for the time being. Regretfully we were forced to get another skip in, if for no other reason that the Land Rover has been parked with its future owner for the past few weeks. Yep, the deal has been made, our baby will be someone else’s in the near future. *sob*

On a more cheerful note, Pim (grandpa’s crossbreed) will be traveling to Finland next month, to be with his new family over there. My friend T found him a home, so at least that is one problem less. Secondly she has found a foster home for Tadaika (another cross, and our problem child with the other dogs) a little later this summer while she looks for a home for her. Another problem less. Did have to have Tadaika spaded this week, which had the poor baby miserable, despite her perfect behavior. She was really whimpering, and that is very unusual for her. Normally she is very stoic about pain, but at the moment she really has plastered herself to my leg (the bum one, naturally) and needs the comfort of proximity. While I took my nap this morning (was up at 4 AM to bring big brother to the airport) she was in the middle of the bed, so I had to hook my legs over her to get to a semi-stretch at least. Luckily I was tired enough not to mind.

Am finding myself rather emotional lately. The end of an era kind of thing, I guess. The slow process of saying goodbye to everything familiar…again. And the dogs…gawd, that hurts a lot, but choices, as they say, make us who we are. The way we figure, we can’t help them here if we’re working too hard at competing with the locals, so…difficult, to say the least. There are times that I just have a bit of an emotional overload and the only thing I can do then is just shut down for a bit and say, fuck it!!! (pardon my language) what must happen will happen; fate and all that carp. It’s how you handle it that matters, I always think.

So, on overall I’m trying to muster a modicum of enthusiasm about this “adventure”. On the plus side, I won’t be on my own just yet, what with big brother going too…well, he better. I was seriously pondering looking for work in the UK, Ireland, Canada, or the US, if I was going to have to go out and look for the proverbial fortune, but he suggested that it would probably be better if we start out in the Netherlands to get our bearings, and then see where we go from there after we’ve had time to catch our breaths, so to speak. I do need to catch my breath for a bit, regain my equilibrium and build some reserves because the past five years or so have definitely taken their toll. There are times when I feel scarily empty inside, and that is never good.

But enough about that, I hate it when I get maudling. What else…well, there still is plenty to do, least of all hauling stuff away and tossing them. Luckily I only need to pack summer clothes when the time is there, now all that remains to be seen is whether I can get it all in the suitcases.

Went to my first workout in twelve days the day before yesterday. I managed a measly half hour, which had me burst in tears at the end…and rush out the gym before anyone noticed. Don’t even know why, since it didn’t hurt atrociously, or that I was disappointed in what I DID manage to do. Had about seven minutes on a bicycle, pumped my biceps, did abs, walked at a 5 incline for about 200 meters, and on the overall was pleased with that. It was just…discomfort, I guess, as if my body wasn’t entirely my own which wrecked my mental stability, or some such. I’m sure that there is some sort of logical explanation for it, but all in all I just want to focus on the good side of it that I went, and did something at least. Yay! I think I’ll go again tonight…I’ll let you know if I did. Hah.

As to my present transport…it’s a little embarrassing. A Fiat 500, I kid you not. To drive it we have to push our seats back against the tiny back seats, so with big brother and me in it, it looks even smaller, like a Smart. Hah. I call it a zit on the road, and surprisingly it isn’t even all that frugal. It drives about 1 in 10, 9 here in the mountains, while my (former) Land Rover drove a nice 1 in 8 and had a gazillion more horse power. How weird is that? And here folks have been telling me that the newer smaller cars are SOOOOO much more frugal. Nooooo! It’s a lie, not to mention disappointing. Here we thought that by doing a rental we could at least save some of the costs in the fuel. Grrrr.

We’ve had some strangely cloudy weather lately, even a splash of rain, but enough to battle this year’s drought, I fear. Everything is looking abysmally yellow, especially this early in the year, but at least the temps are still nice. There are cool breezes coming in most of the time, meaning that I am now sitting outside in the shade of the eucalypti trees, enjoying an afternoon outside in peace and quiet…for as far as that is possible with Kolossus barking at cars over a mile off. *snort* She likes barking way too much. Hah.

Well, that’s it for today. I will try to write again before actually moving to the Netherlands, but I can’t promise anything. By then I should also know if the operation was a success, since I have an appointment with my doctor four days before my departure…was iffy about being able to get my last appointment in, by the way. Apparently there were no slots free in his appointment book until after the sixth of July, (four days after my departure) but after explaining it all to the receptionist, who then made the effort to contact the doctor and arrange for another appointment at an earlier date (the 29^th, thank you very much) that would allow me to actually make it. Yay.

I’ll keep you posted.